Baby Binging My Way into Onederland!

So... seeing as how it's been ages since I've blogged... lots has happened since then.  The biggest being my phone interview... Wednesday I had a phone interview for a hospital chaplain position at the Cleveland Clinic in Cleveland, Ohio.  The interview went very well and they invited me up for a face-to-face interview on June 23rd.  I'm really nervous and really excited and I decided that this is exactly what I need to get me going on my weight loss journey again.  I have been stuck emotionally for several months... processing the frustration of road blocks in my job search as personal rejection and I let this emotion dig me into a deep, muddy hole of depression .  I was functioning out of this false sense of reality that if I work hard, I can achieve anything... I can attain anything... because that has always "worked" for me before.  Now that I'm graduated and ordained, and putting myself out into the world as "Rev. Megan Elizabeth Lilburn, M.Div" for the first time, it's not working anymore... and that disrupted my worldview.  Recently I've reframed this difficult battle to accept that while it's disappointing not to get offers on these jobs I have applied to, it's not a personal rejection, just a reflection of the competitive and highly saturated job market for chaplains. Thursday in my CPE unit evals I explained this new reframing as allowing me to get unstuck...  I finally sat down, put down the shovel and let things dry up a little... I know I'm not out of my hole yet, but I'm not stuck anymore either.  It's still going to take some work to climb out of the hole I dug for myself... but at least I put away my shovel, gave myself time to grieve, and started the work of climbing out.  So... as I make my way out of my emotional hole, I know that it is time to get out of my weight-loss hole too and get my butt in full gear again.... and so I set a new goal of dropping into Onederland before my interview... that means losing about nine pounds in about 4 weeks... which really should not be that hard if I can stay focused....
And watching The Biggest Loser Finale helped too... I totally want to be Hannah!
So Onderland, here I come... but of course... I set this goal just in time to go on vacation!
And... stereotypically speaking... vacations carry with them the fear of putting on extra pounds.
I'm spending the week in Roswell, New Mexico with my best friend Jen and her family... and part of the deal is that I get to keep her baby Reece at home with me while Jen and Matt work.  So... I'm mostly sitting "at home" all day playing with Reece... but when he's sleeping... prime snack time, right?  You would think... but I've been rocking the plan this week!
I'm not sure if it's because I'm not at my own home so I'm not as comfortable snacking or if it's because I am feeling committed to my new goal... but so far, it's been a really great week.  And it helps that Jen is committed to eating healthy too so she is a really good influence on me and a great buddy for eating right!

So Friday night Matt grilled Steak and Zuchini.  Saturday Jen and I drove to Ruidoso and went to the horse races and lost our whole $10 a piece... we each bet $5 a piece on different horses to show in 2 races and we both lost both races... pretty lame!  Then she took me out to dinner at Casa Blanca... for some excellent Chile Rellenos.  So yeah, Chile Rellenos aren't exactly "being good" but it was the first day of my Weight Watchers week, because I usually weigh-in on Saturdays, so I had all my "weekly points plus" and I had only used 14 "daily points plus" for breakfast and dinner... so I am still on track with more than enough "weekly points plus" points left.  That is part of the beauty of Weight Watchers!
For breakfast I've been having Bagel sandwiches with Bagel Thins, 1/3 less fat Cream Cheese and Deli Fresh turkey slices with an orange or a grapefruit (for a 6 point breakfast).  For Lunch I've been making sandwiches with Bagel Thins, Weight Watchers spreadable Swiss Cheese wedges, Avocado and a Boca burger pattie (for an 8 point lunch).  Last night Matt grilled chicken and veggie kabobs.  Tonight Jen is making Poblanos stuffed with lean ground turkey, brown rice, reduced fat cheese and rotel (an 8 point dinner).  Tomorrow night I am making Chicken Amore.  Wednesday night I'm making turkey burgers stuffed with reduced fat string cheese and steamed broccoli.  Thursday night I'm cooking Soy Glazed Salmon and Soy Glazed Green Beans.
I've been snacking on fruit and resisting Matt's Doritos, even though they are tempting... so  I got some Quaker Quakes Rice Cake Snacks instead. 
I've gone for at least a 30 minute walk every day.  This morning I woke up and ate my breakfast, then Reece woke up and I fed him and we went for a long walk.  He fell asleep by the time we got home and I took a shower while he napped.  Then we played some more until he went down for another nap at noon.  Jen and Matt came home at lunch and we ate lunch and then Reece woke up and I seasoned the chicken and ground turkey while they played with him.  It's been lots of fun... truly the good life!  I joked earlier today with Caitlin that I was Baby Binging... instead of food binging... eating up all the baby time I can while I can!  Quality baby time is a supreme substitute for food... I'll take it any day!
I fully expect that I will be right on target this week and look forward to weighing in when I get back in town... and until then... I am having lots of fun!

Stress Eating Keeps Me Stuck

Wow... so it's been a loooong time... probably because weight loss is not going so well... I'm just sort of hanging in the balance... everyday I have to start over... last week I only lost 0.2 lbs but at least it was a loss...
I am trying all the recommended "tricks"...
trying new foods... changing things up... using my weekly points plus on weekends or special occasions instead of spreading them out over the week. 
My new favorite veggie treat is butternut squash fries... they're fantastic.  You just cut up a squash in fry-like pieces, spray the pan with olive oil cooking spray, spread the fries out, spray the tops with a little olive oil cooking spray and season (I use a little garlic salt and cayenne pepper). 
I've changed up breakfast... sometimes it's steel cut oats with dried fruit, sometimes its eggs, sometimes its an english muffin with PB2, sometimes I go back to my old faithful strawberry banana protein smoothie...
I've been bringing my lunch to work so I'm not tempted to eat whatever sounds good in the cafeteria, ie. PIZZA... 
I've been riding my bike to work...
But I haven't had the drive to get to the gym... and when I get home... I snack... lots of fruits mostly, but that doesn't help with weight loss... So the journey continues... I'm ready to conquer this stress hump and get moving again! 

Start-Over Sundays!

It's another start-up day... the past several weeks have been less than ideal and so has my diet... 

which obviously reflected on the scale yesterday when I went to the Weight Watchers meeting on Hulen for the first time.  So... it's time to get my butt in gear again!  

Yesterday I went to the grocery store and stocked up on good foods to help me get back on track and spent today cooking and cleaning... trying once again to get back on board!

Got some fruits and veggies and lean meats...

So... 

for breakfast I had steel cut oats cooked with dried cranberries, dried blueberries and and raisins!

(7 PPV)

For lunch I had a delicious new creation...

Sun-Dried Tomato FlatOut (3 PPV)

1/3 c pizza sauce (1 PPV)

1/2 c shredded cheese (4 PPV)

Sauteed artichoke hearts and broccoli florets (FREE)

I made an extra pizza for tomorrow (when I am stuck at work for 28 hrs)

I made my favorite Mashed Cauliflower and Butternut Squash Soup and portioned them out for the week...

I made butternut Squash fries for a snack today... just sliced the squash in strips and sprayed it with a little Olive Oil, sprinkled it with salt and cooked it on 350 for 30 min. 

Delicious!

I got some frozen Smart Ones and Lean Cuisine meals too... for those days that I need to leave for work in a rush, so that I don't wing it in the cafeteria.

I am starting over again again and hoping that maybe I can divert my attention and focus and stresses into the one thing I have control over these days!

So... here it goes!

Today was successful... until the migraine now that won't go away!  Going to bed and praying for success tomorrow too!